Monday, 02 February 2009

• Winter Quarter Update

  I need to be more consistent in writing entries. So far, my new years resolution isn't going very well, but at least its the second month and I'm still trying. Maybe part of it has something to do with the fact that I don't want to write anything unless I have time to process and sit down long enough to get everything out. But right now, I'm just free writing and I gotta admit that free writing works too. So I've been trying to challenge my women's group (and myself) to journal more because when we reflect on things that happened in our lives, God's hand print becomes more evident and we're able to remind ourselves and even physically see God working in our lives.

  Kairos. I definitely pushed myself a lot last quarter like taking five classes, volunteering at Salk Institute and doing ministry. I pushed myself to the point where I ended up not passing a class. But over winter break, I just felt like I wanted more. I want to be more involved in Kairos, I want to develop friendships, I want to know people's personal stories and I want to love people the way God loves them. But I can't do it on my own. Last friday during small group when we were discussing why fellowship was so hard at our church, I realized that I just don't love the people there the way the Acts 2 church loved each other. I used to think that just by doing that stuff, praying and worshipping together, breaking bread together, eating meals and living life together was enough. I have no problem doing that. I can worship with people during service, I can eat meals with them after service or before bible study, I can pray with them during wednesday night encounter, but beyond the tangibility, beyond the almost superficial layer of the "act" of worship, I can't say that I love them to the point where I can even say that I love God if I don't even love people or things that BELONG to Him? I'm not at a point where I'm self-condemning but this definitely hit me enough to stir my heart. DAH, loving people is so hard. How does He do it?

  BTW, I really, really, really, really, really, love how God moves at Kairos. My heart may not be completely invested in Kairos but the more I serve there, the more I get to know the people and the more plugged in I get, the more and more (much much more!) I see God moving within the church. I love that Kairos is determined and focused on being a gospel centered church and that they always remind us how important and life giving the gospel message is.

  Women's Groups. I have to confess that last quarter, I really put the sixth college women's group low on my priorities list, but this quarter, I'm determined to have us super, super invested in each other. I've learned a lot through GPAD that I didn't expect to learn, like what true fellowship really is. I like that our friendships were not limited to a Perk's table on Fridays or Marie's couch in ERC on Sundays. Even though we didn't really see each other through the week, its nice to know that there's someone out there thinking of you and praying for you. I liked that our friendships weren't define by the amount of time we spent with each other but that because God was the foundation of our friendship, we were able to get closer without having to physically see each other all the time. I love that when we meet, it doesn't seem like an obligation or not just "another women's group" but that its a space where we can pour out into each other and get poured into and it's always refreshing in the end.

  Relationships. I like Aaron. The End. :)

  • 11:48 AM
  • 48 Views
  • 2 eProps
  • 2 Comments